However, this past month I have been 'thinking' of his cousin as a little more than a friend. I can't get him out of my head and everytime I see him, I get butterflies in my stomach and am really nervous around him.
He is a big part of my daughters life and he is always over to visit.
I have never cheated, nor do I intend to, but this cousin makes me think I want to. Just thinking of him that way makes feel like I am cheating.
I tried ignoring the feelings, but they only seem to get stronger. I know there is no future together and that my future lies with my fiance. He is the one I want to grow old with. He is the one to father a couple more kids and he is the one I want to go to sleep with and wake up beside.
How do I make these feelings go away for his cousin????Advice about unwanted feelings for another guy?
When our mind plays the ';what if?'; game it does so to entertain and please us, it's not about facts and reality. You already know this, you know that your future is with your fianc茅 and what you think/feel for the cousin isn't real it's just thoughts. It's possible that the decision to marry within the next year has triggered your mind to do the ';what if'; game since a marriage is a very serious thing. Luckily you are mature enough to see it for what it is, there are many women that hurt their men and ruin their relationships over a dream that's never meant to become real.
Try to see these feeling as a game that your mind is playing to see how mature you are. (You are doing fine by the way. *smiles*) The feelings are a part of a fantasy and if you had been younger then it would have been about your main interest at the time, perhaps about owning your own pony or being famous or... you know, but now you are getting married so now it's about a man.
And, when you get over this it's still not over. Now and the when you least expect it your mind can play games on you again, but the next time you'll know what it's all about. This usually happens when life is very boring or when there are life changes.
Me, I had a crush on one of my husbands friends (before we got married) and I think it was simply because he was not the marrying kind and I was worried about how marriage would change my life. I got over it after a while and I've had no regrets. Today I resort to writing romantic short stories when I feel like playing ';what if'; games. =)
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